Regression by Advancement

Regular readers of this blog (as regularly [or not] as I post, anyway), might remember that time I got LASIK and was all excited and glowy about my new eyeballs.

It's been 21 months since then, and I just got glasses. *insert sad face*

I'm not being forced to wear glasses, insofar as my vision is perfectly adequate for day to day stuff and I'm legal for driving and everything. But I'm off just enough that the bagillion hours a day I'm on the computer has become a problem, mostly at night.

I was so freaking nearsighted that I was afraid they wouldn't be able to correct it fully. What they do is overcorrect, because during healing it rebounds and hopefully hits the center. Well, I didn't rebound enough, so I'm slightly farsighted. Which would be okay if my left eye hadn't regained or retained a slight bit of astigmatism. Add that I'm getting the "old age" issue where things are now blurry in the few inches right in front of me, and my eyes are fighting pretty hard, without the right tools (as in, youth and elasticity), to see the near mid distance.

So I caved, and I bought glasses. For computer use.

I hate them so freaking much.

First, I mean, look at them. I tried on a dozen pairs in my price range, and none of them looked good. I thought these were the best combination of vision field and "not making me look twice as ugly as I normally do anyway," but they're just way too wide for my face.

That doesn't really matter, as I assured myself and the technician when I bought them, because no one will see me (unless I plaster the pictures on my blog and Facebook, sheesh). They're for computer use. But that's only the most minor reason to hate them.

They're heavy. Oh, not really. The check-out scale at the grocery register would probably squawk at me suspiciously if I tried to bag them. They could probably be mailed for regular postage. But my nose says they're heavy.

They're also crooked. The tech said they looked very straight, and when I looked in the mirror, they did look that way. But, see, it doesn't matter how they look to everyone else. It matters that the top edge of the frame on the right is higher than the top edge of the frame on the left. So I'll have to get them adjusted.

Which won't help much, because geez looeez, those frames are intrusive! I think they might sit too far off my face, or maybe just further off my face than my old ones. They're certainly not as round and wide of coverage as my old ones. Which looks better, but my field of vision is so tiny. I glance down at my keyboard and it's 100% below the glasses. No peripheral vision, either, because the frames block it completely. Good thing I had LASIK so I can see around them.

The weird thing is that I put them on for about 78 seconds, and for 20 minutes afterward, I could still see the frames. Freaking annoying!

The good thing—duh—is how clear the computer screen is. Phew. That's the job they're supposed to do, after all. But I took them off and wanted to weep, because the difference was so huge, and I didn't think I'd be able to tolerate NOT wearing them, and that's just not acceptable. I mean, I have two more payments on the LASIK! My eyeballs aren't even mine yet! Luckily, my eyes refocused in a second or two and everything was fine.

But now I have a headache, and I wore them for no more than half an hour, tops. I guess there will be an adjustment period, as there is with anything. But I shall endeavor not to feel sorry for myself after today.

There's no percentage in that.