Good for You, New York!

Last night, I heard Number One pounding through the house. "She has news," I said, and paused the TV. She flew down the stairs, and a prepared myself for a funny celebrity tidbit. But no, her excitement far outstripped normal.

"New York just legalized gay marriage!" she cried.

This morning, I spent some time reading articles, checking out the rainbow-lit Empire State Building, and crying a little. I have few friends or acquaintances who are gay, but this is a cause that I feel fiercely about—so fiercely, it's the only controversial topic I ever blog about.

This feels big. So much bigger than just adding a sixth state with legal gay marriage. I really believe this is going to start a cascade of legality. I think we've turned a corner, one we could only turn by time and pressure. Because honestly, the longer the argument goes on, the more ridiculous it sounds.

Number One said a lot of the talk among her peers was about Tiger Woods and Charlie Sheen, those paragons of traditional marriage. Seriously, when proponents of "family values" are getting flicked off their political pedestals because of infidelity, how on earth can they claim gay marriage threatens the institution? If having sex with prostitutes and posting your junk on Twitter doesn't do it, how will two men or two women getting married do it?

My neighbor's divorce did not undermine my partnership with my husband. Heck my parents' divorce didn't damage my marriage! So how would two guys getting married be any kind of a threat? If two people live together for 15 years, support each other through their careers, and even raise kids together, why would legalizing all of that so they can actually benefit from it instead of getting penalized do any harm to the rest of us?

I have still never heard a satisfactory explanation. Because there isn't one. And the longer the argument goes on, the more apparent that will come, and the more states will realize it doesn't help anyone to keep fighting.

So congratulations, New York and New Yorkers. May your marriages be long and loving.

The Courage of Kurt on Glee

Everyone knows courage is not the absence of fear, but acting despite fear. It can manifest in physical or emotional ways. Physical courage inspires swooning, but what we really long to witness is emotional courage.

One of the most courageous characters being portrayed today is Kurt on Glee. When the show first started, he was a point of amusement. Resigned to being bullied and tossed in a dumpster every morning, but asking his tormentors to wait while he takes off his designer sweater.

By itself, Kurt’s unconcealed homosexuality is brave. Kurt knows who he is and refuses to hide it, though it would make his life a lot easier. As season one went on, we got to see a little better how hard it really was. Slushies, crushes, and, yes, a desire to belong that led him to the football team.

Kurt came out to his father at a younger age than many kids do. His father is fantastic, but far from perfect, and his inability to understand his son made the decision terrifying. Kurt also let his feelings for Finn show, which was completely disastrous, but still courageous. Like anyone, he wants to be loved.

Dad. I have something that I want to say. I'm glad that you're proud of me. But I don't want to lie anymore. Being a part of the Glee Club and football has really shown me that I can be anything, and what I am, is, I'm gay.

In season 2, the bullying reached terrifying levels. Kurt’s first kiss was abusive, his attempts to reach out to his abuser, to help him, running into a stone wall. Some might say Kurt’s decision to change schools was not courageous, but I think it was. Despite the fear he lived with, Kurt had friends, a group he fit in with. He had to start all over at the new school, and their zero tolerance policy and apparent acceptance of homosexuality among the non-homosexual students doesn’t make him automatically a part of things. This was apparent when he wasn’t immediately embraced by the glee club.

I originally wrote this post several weeks ago, and said, “Romantic heroes don’t have to be big burly men. Love is love, and I hope Glee lasts long enough for Kurt to find someone who truly appreciates who he is and what he has to offer.” In an awesome coincidence, last week’s episode gave us just that! Raise your hand if you absolutely loved Kurt and Blaine’s kiss. And the other kiss!



Glee is the only show of its kind that I watch. So tell me: what other characters out there display the kind of emotional courage Kurt does? Do you consider them heroic?

We’re giving away another $25 gift certificate this week, to the bookstore of YOUR choice! So comment anywhere this full post appears to be entered in the drawing.

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Check out Fight or Flight, my March release from Carina Press. Also available as an audiobook!
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