Slow cars in front of me, slow thinking, slow talking, but especially, slow walkers. I'm a fast walker. Drives my husband insane. I find it physically impossible to walk as slow as he does. I especially hate it like in the mall or on a sidewalk where a group of people stretches out and moves at a snail's pace and you can't get around them. I am tolerant of injured or elderly, and that's pretty much it.
2. Drivers who can't make the turn
If you have to come to a complete stop in the middle of the friggin' road to make a right turn into a parking lot or, worse, another street, I'm likely to plow into you. Well, okay, not, because technically I'd be liable. But I'll yell and make lots of arm-waving gestures to demonstrate my displeasure.
This is a problem, actually, because my 8-year-old is known to growl, "Make the turn!" from the back seat.
3. Arm water
I hate having water run up my arms. I don't wash my face at night because rinsing it means splashing my face with water and then it runs up my forearms (which are upright, so it's technically down my arms, but if I said that you'd have no idea what I was talking about). Sometimes it happens when I'm taking out/putting in my contacts. I hate it.
4. Gender bias
This is a big one. Not bias in the sense of active discrimination, but "women love to shop, men love to roll over and go to sleep after sex" kind of stuff. I know there are some basic biological differences, but even those aren't universal. There are plenty of women who are physically stronger than many men, and plenty of men who are capable of multi-tasking. So I hatehatehate when someone blames an individual's behavior on their gender.
5. Generalizations stated as absolutes
Generalizations, like stereotypes, exist for a reason. I make them occasionally, though I try to avoid it. But a generalization stated as an absolute drives me INSANE.
6. When people bash others to elevate themselves or something connected to them
I see this in the publishing industry a lot. Authors published with micro press verbally shred publishers with bigger, more commercial houses, and talk about how their publishers are better. I adore my publisher, have nothing but positive things to say about them. But they are great because they're great. Not because New York sucks. The same with, say, sports. The New England Patriots are a stellar football team, and they are even if the Indianapolis Colts are also a stellar football team. It's not necessary to insult their coach or blame them for cheating in order to elevate the Pats. (Though they did totally pipe in crowd noise and the officials did a horrible job. :) )
7. Not hearing
It really frustrates me when someone is trying to talk to me and I can't hear them well enough to understand the words. Especially when I have to ask them to repeat it more than one. What's ironic is...
8. Not being heard
...I get equally frustrated when I'm telling someone something and they have to ask me more than once to repeat it.
9. Age apologism
This is probably going to annoy (or, better, amuse) a lot of people, since I'm only 36 (I keep calling myself 37 even though I'm not for another 39 days). It bugs me when people blame forgetfulness or misunderstanding or lack of knowledge on their age. We are all forgetful, and that's because we either have far too many things to remember and deal with, or we are focused in one direction and other things fall by the wayside (or a combination). Not getting a pop culture reference means you haven't seen that movie or paid attention to that celebrity's news--"out of touch" has nothing to do with being "old." And at the bottom of the "acceptable excuses" pile is technology. If my 86-year-old grandfather can send me e-mail, anyone can. The ability to learn new things, and to teach yourself new things, only stalls if you let it.
10. Dishes not being put in the sink right
This is such a silly one, yet it annoys me so much. Okay, I admit, it's very neurotic and anal. But I do dishes every single day, and it's not my favorite thing to do. Of course. So I've asked everyone to put things that go in the bottom of the dishwasher on the left side of the sink, things that go in the top on the right, and silverware in the tray. You're putting your cup in the sink anyway, just shift it an inch to the right. Why is that so frickin' hard?
11. Football announcers jinx
I swear, every time they announce some often obscure but usually cool stat, it immediately gets broken. Like, "Adam Vinatieri has never missed a field goal in this stadium" and he immediately misses. Or, "The Patriots have scored on their first possession for 15 games" and then they go three and out. Can't they say the stat AFTER the attempt? Let us know Tom Brady's interception-to-throw ratio at halftime, not right before he tosses a bomb, please.
You know by the time you get down this far, usually the writer is scraping the bottom of the brain to think of something in the category. In this case, I couldn't believe I didn't think of my last two right off the bat. I hate crowds. I hate being considerate and stepping aside to let a woman with a stroller squeeze through the six-inch gap between groups of people clogging the thoroughfare, then being forced to wait while 50 other people stream through, ignoring my obvious attempts to go the other way. I hate being patient and waiting my turn and having someone behind me push me aside to get by. This is one of the rare times I get belligerent with people. "What makes you more important than me? Why is it essential that you get down their first? What difference will two more seconds make?" Grrr.
13. Servers who pour off the top of the soda
I may hate this more than anything else on the list. You go to the movie theater or the drive-thru, and order a Coke (usually a Coke, because it takes longer for the Coke fizz to dissipate than the Diet Coke or Sprite). The server doesn't care how much of their (admittedly cheap) product they waste, and they pour off the top, then fill some more, then pour off the top, then fill some more. The problem is, that "pouring off the top" is also pouring all over the side of the cup. Then they expect you to carry that mess and let it drip all over you and your car. It's lazy and inconsiderate. It's okay, though, I make them wipe it off every time. :)
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