Monday, November 10, 2008

I Have Something I Need to Say

One of my issues with the anti-gay marriage movement is that they have no logical grounds for it besides "I don't like it." They call it immoral and say it threatens "family values." But no one can ever say how.

I was thinking about McCain's interview with Ellen DeGeneres and thought of something I'd love to ask him.

"So you think gay marriage is immoral so I shouldn't have the right to do it. How about if I think having more than two kids is immoral? Should I have the right to tell you that you can't have seven kids, or that the Palins can't have five?" (Note: I know that not all of McCain's kids are his by blood, but he does still have more than two of his own, which is more than zero population growth standards advocate.)

I wonder what he would say. Because in comparison, having that many kids is not only immoral, it's irresponsible and destructive. It puts pressure on the world's natural and social resources. Those kids need food, space, governmental services. His family will pollute a lot more than mine, unless they manage to carpool their entire lives. They contribute to crowding in schools and competition for that ever-shrinking list of available jobs.

And while McCain maybe has always made enough money to support his family, and he personally didn't have to raise them because he didn't live with them most of the time, what about that widower with nine children he abandoned under Nebraska's holey safe harbor law? Would McCain tell me that we should pick and choose who is okay to have more than two kids? If so, how about if we pick and choose who is okay to get married? Ellen and Portia would be okay because they show decorum and stuff, but those guys who hang out at the highway rest areas wouldn't be. I bet he'd have a hard time responding to that suggestion.

Let me make some things clear: I am using McCain as an example only, a representative of all those people, in any political party or out, who has a problem with gay marriage. And while I think having more than two kids does put pressure on environmental and social systems that maybe someday we won't be able to withstand, I don't think I or anyone else has the right to tell people they can't have as many children as they want. (So don't yell at me, Vicki!). That's pretty much my whole point.

Oh, and the whole civil union thing? What the hell's the difference? Leave it to individual religions to decide if they want to allow gay marriages to be performed in their sacred buildings by their representatives. I got married in a non-denominational church/historical landmark by a justice of the peace, the local mayor. My intent in that marriage is no different than my high school best friend's, who got married by both an Episcopalian priest and a Catholic priest. Saying civil unions are okay and marriage isn't invalidates the entire argument that it's bad bad bad.

So, I would really love to hear from someone who can give me the opinion I've been seeking for years. IF you can speak articulately, avoid calling me names, and use proper spelling and grammar and capitalization (leeway allowed for true typos), I invite you to enlighten me. If someone can provide a realistic reason that gay marriage is a bigger threat to the family unit than abuse, adultery, absentee parenting, neglect, or divorce, I'll concede the point.

This was going to be, like, one paragraph. I guess I figured if I was going to violate my own rules and open up the topic at all, I might as well go all the way!

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