OMFG

I thought I was broken.

It's been a rough week, and we all know last week's episode was incredibly draining and hard, and I kept saying I couldn't do it, I couldn't watch the rest.

And today I actually thought about not watching it. I had no positive anticipation, just dread. I really felt like I could walk away and never watch it again.

Do I need to tell you I'm glad I didn't?

It's late, I'm very tired, and this week's ep was again very draining. I was het up a few minutes ago, but I fade fast nowadays. Bottom line: expect this post to be all over the place.

First, Number One and I had a brainstorming moment:

Ruby: [Lilith's] older than she looks.

Number One: But in season three, Tammy said she was a new up-and-comer in town.

Me: Well, maybe she was just new on earth.

My brain: Except she was on earth when she collected Ruby, even though that was hundreds of years ago.

Me: Or had to wait to start breaking seals until certain things were in place, like Samhain can only be raised every 600 years.

My brain: ...but hundreds of seals...can't be timing re: Samhain, jus tuse other seal...wait, what else was timing...In the Beginning...Aza--

Me: Gasp! *grabs Number One's arm*

Number One: *stares at me* Your hand is warm. Please remove it.

Me: The demon gate to hell! Lilith was in hell until Jake opened the gate! That was Azazel's plan for all that time, he was trying to get things into place to open the gate and get Lilith out! Because she was the only one who could free Lucifer!

So now it seems pretty obvious, and I'm sure most of you already thought of it. I mean, Lilith appeared after the gate opened (though many episodes after). Castiel said in "In the Beginning" that they were trying to work out Azazel's end game, and that it was tied to Lilith. The clues have been there all along, so... Anyway, it felt like a revelation to me.

Lilith eats babies. Of course. And OMGgross.

Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki knocked it out of the park. Incredible performances, especially Jared, being alone most of the time. I can't imagine withdrawal is easy to portray, what with the twitching and all.

Sam being flung around the edge of the panic room might just be the best damned stunt they've ever done.

When Castiel told Anna he had orders to set Sam free, I figured that means Dean has to save the world from Armageddon by somehow defeating Sam in some special way. It's another thing that seems obvious--if indeed it's right--but I've been fighting the whole brother-vs-brother idea very hard all season. Still, it's very Cain and Abel, so it feels right.

Anyone else think Bobby wasn't Bobby for a while? When he was telling Dean they were killing Sam, and maybe they should let him out and use him to stop Lilith, and so on, I just couldn't buy that the words were coming out of Bobby's mouth. And when Dean said no, no way, this was the line he would not cross, and Bobby looked at Dean...he looked just like Zachariah. So I'm thinking Zachariah possessed Bobby.

Now, of course, there's the whole anti-possession tattoo thing. Bobby's GOT to have one. But those charms and tattoos are to prevent demon possession. No one knew or believed the angels even existed. Plus, I think Z is powerful enough to bypass it. I know he talks to Dean next week, so maybe he'll confirm if I'm right on this.

If I'm wrong, then...bad writing, Sera. OOC beyond justification, and you all know how much I can justify. :)

But that brings me to the preview for next week.

MAJOR SPOILERS (PROMO-RELATED) FOR NEXT WEEK, PLUS SPECULATION

Sam's eyes go black. Two possibilities--he's crossed over to Monster!Sam, or he's possessed. But he has the tattoo, and Lilith said she couldn't do anything to him. Then, at the end, he says he's been waiting for this for a very long time. Well, that doesn't fit Sam, so it points to possession again. The words indicate Lilith, but that doesn't seem possible.

So I'm thinking Lucifer. I know, that doesn't suit the black eyes, but it fits everything else. It fits the "wait for long time" thing, it fits the rules of possession--Lucifer isn't a demon, either, he's an angel, and maybe a fallen one, but presumably pretty powerful--and the damned episode is titled "Lucifer Rising." If they're gonna send Dean to hell, why wouldn't they raise Lucifer? And all supernatural beings need a body to walk the earth. Lucifer would totally pick Gigantor Sam.

OOooooohhhh...I just had another thought. We've all assumed Ruby has something else in mind for Sam, right? That she probably doesn't just have simple revenge on her mind.

I bet she's been prepping Sam to host Lucifer.

OMFG.