Not Battable

I always swore I would not be a cliché. That I would be open and accepting, because it's just the way life goes. But I can't help it:

Getting old sucks.

Shut up, Bicky! LOL

But you know why it sucks? It's not because of my weird tanning/freckling or the slight wrinkles on my face, or the fact that everything creaks when I stand up (that's the lack of exercise as much as the aging).

It sucks because my eyelashes have disappeared.

I don't wear makeup much anymore because it's a pain, and because it makes no difference. I only ever wore eye makeup, but now the eyeliner and shadow get absorbed in a few hours and the mascara doesn't have enough to adhere to, so instead of highlighting my eyes, it just irritates them.

So I was excited when I saw the ad in People magazine for Latisse. Even though I knew I couldn't justify whatever the cost is for a little vanity. I did some research this morning, read some reviews, looked at the before-and-afters...and it's really, really tempting.

Results, of course, vary. My lashes are shorter and sparser than most of the ones in the gallery, and one or two of the featured subjects didn't have a very big difference. Some had a HUGE difference, though, enough to make me salivate. The side effects are minimal--temporary itching and redness for some people--and the process simple and convenient.

The cost is usually $120, plus whatever the local doctor would charge (there are only 2) to see me and prescribe/provide it. And the results fade after you stop using it. Plus...who cares if I have short lashes? I mean, it would be nice to look better. I'm not totally unattractive, overall, and it's hard to see my best features (eyes, lips) fading away. I don't spend much time looking at myself, and I don't see other people all that much, and they probably aren't sitting there thinking, "I'd be enjoying this conversation so much better if Natalie had nicer eyelashes."

So I guess I'll skip it. Unless someone wants to treat me for my birthday. :)

Five Things Make a Post

CE Murphy is always saying that on her blog, and I keep thinking of little things to post, and that sounded more interesting to put in the subject line than something generically random.

1. I have a vacation story I forgot to tell. It's not that unique, but still amazing. We were down in Gatlinburg, Tennessee, near the Great Smoky Mountains, right on the edge of the national park, and nearly 600 miles from home.

So on Wednesday night of last week, I was walking back to our cabin from the pool. There's a couple sitting on the porch of the cabin next to ours, and the guy calls out to me. A few questions about our hot tub, our grill, etc. I, cold and wet and anti-social, kept trying to escape into the cabin, but he kept calling out to me. Finally, he asked where we're from.

Me: "Pennsylvania."

Him: "Us, too!" Before I can ask, he adds, "Harrisburg area!"

Okay, that's freaky, so I stop and actually give him my attention. "So are we!"

Together: "Mechanicsburg!"

Turns out, they live literally about a block away from us. Their street is behind our house, on the other side of the parallel street. He had his granddaughters with him, and Number One had come outside when she heard me yelling across, so he asked how old my girls were. Turns out...his younger granddaughter and Number One hang out in the mornings before school.

I apologized to him for being so rude. I told him if I was never going to see him again I wouldn't care, but since I could run into him at the grocery store... He didn't really listen, so I don't think he even noticed my rudeness.

2. I'm going to say something I never thought I'd say. In fact, some of you may think this isn't me, that my blog's been hijacked.

Scratch that. Very few of you will have any idea what I'm talking about. Where's Kim W. when I need her?! Oh, well, I'll say it anyway.

Terrell Owens has earned my respect.

I know. Totally O.o and :o and whatever the emoticon is for "are you out of your freakin' mind?"

You may know I really, REALLY don't like reality TV. I don't watch any, and never have. But on vacation, the kids wanted to watch Super Stars, and I was reading in the same room (family togetherness, 24/7) and got...well, hooked. It's going to be a regular Tuesday-night family date now.

The premise of the show is that a celebrity gets paired with an athlete. The kids wanted to watch because their favorite dancer from DWTS, Maks, is one of the celebrities. And it's a really fun show, with fun personalities. All except one. And no, that one is not Terrell Owens.

T.O. is the most loudmouthed, obnoxious member of the NFL. He is arrogant, disruptive to every team he is on...and, unfortunately, talented enough to make them tolerate it. But on Super Stars, he's met his match.

His partner is some supermodel I've never heard of. She spends all her time pooching her lips and smoothing her hair off her face. She wore goggles in one of the events--the only person who did--so she wouldn't mess up her eye makeup. And she continuously harangued her partner.

EVERY other team was supportive of each other, no matter how poorly they did, and even of other teams. By last night's show, the second round of competition, there was true camaraderie among everyone--except her. She is so friggin' SNOTTY. They got eliminated in the first round, but due to injury were brought back. No matter how poorly she does, everything is T.O.'s fault. She drops non-stop F-bombs, says "you call yourself an athlete?" and "you're not worth the millions they pay you" and so on. She's HATEFUL.

And here's why I respect T.O. He's totally the kind of guy who can give as good as he gets. But it wasn't that kind of environment, and he NEVER said anything back to her. He tried, very hard, to be a good sport, to cheer her on, to be a team player. He took her crap and refrained from whacking her upside the head, which I, a non-violent person most of the time, felt was completely justified. The worst he did was say, "I feel sorry for your boyfriend" as they walked away and he probably thought they were off camera.

Good for you, T.O. Impressive stuff.

~~~~~~~~~~
Okay, well, 5 things can't make a post when you're this long-winded. Plus, I can't remember what else I was going to post about. Hope I wasn't too boring--I promise, tomorrow I'll be shorter and more interesting. I think.

Summer Excitement

I'm back from vacation! I fully intended to post while I was away, but barely had time to keep up with my e-mail. We had a lot of fun. White-water rafting, obviously, though class 2 rapids aren't exactly "white." Number Two begged us to go to the upper river later in the week, which had class 3 and 4 rapids, and we said maybe next time. My friend Jody Wallace came to see us, with her adorable children, and we spent a great day at the pool, evening at Dixie Stampede, and breakfast at Mama's Table or whatever it was called. In between we walked all over Gatlinburg, toured Cades Cove (and caught ONE five-second glimpse of a bear, despite the warnings everywhere of how active they've been), and played mini golf. Number Two's influence again. She's a fanatic.

As promised, here's what my knee looked like a few minutes after it happened:



I thought the pattern was pretty. The damned thing still hurts, because the skin gets pulled with every step I take, and there's no comfortable position for it when I'm not moving.

My inattentiveness didn't stop there. Thursday or Friday, I'm not sure when, I ran over my middle toe on my right foot with the bathroom door. I did some kind of damage, not sure what--nail bed, probably--because even though the toe itself doesn't hurt anymore, I can't wear a sock. I know. Weird, right? I put on my socks to go work out yesterday morning and the pressure of the sock on the toenail was too intense. I don't think Planet Fitness allows flip-flops on the treadmill. So no workouts this week.

Let's see, what else...oh. Yeah. Stupid animals have FILTHED up my house! I don't know, I think they had a party. How else could there be so much dirt and fur scattered so far and wide? We had a family obligation on Sunday, and yesterday I caught up with the checkbook and e-mail and grocery shopping and stuff, so today's been cleaning. I'm getting there, but I had something going on that kept me tethered to the computer. I kept forcing myself to go vacuum...then come back and check e-mail...then go scrub the bathroom...check e-mail...find reasons to stay at my desk--hey, I need to blog! LOL It's over for now, so I'm off to finish de-furring my floors.

I just wish it lasted for more than five minutes. :(

Smokin' Day One

First day of vacation in the Great Smoky Mountains!

Yesterday was 10 hours of travel, and though we started out in a torrential downpour, the drive was mostly really good.

Shoney's is the most ubiquitous restaurant in the world, and I get queasy thinking about eating there again. The food was fine (except for Number One's steak--J said "never order steak in a place like this!) but the faucet in the bathroom was so corroded there was a hole in it. For some reason, that really grosses me out.

Tennessee is beautiful. A lot of the time I can't tell we're not in Pennsylvania, but then the land opens up and it's a little more rolling, and of course the mountains are grander. I can't believe all the trailers/mobile homes here. Most of them are situated on huge tracts of land. Odd.

Today we woke around 6 to thunderous storms. They moved on after a while, and the weather was good enough to hike the Laurel Falls trail in the park. It was excellent. Just enough of a hike for us out-of-shape adults, with natural A/C at the falls themselves to cool us after the uphill climb.

On the way down, I hit a patch of...well, patching on the paved trail, and my food skidded out from under me and I landed hard on my knee.

Twice.

J tells me "slow down, small steps!" I told him I'm not 5. After I realized the patches and my right sneaker didn't get along, I was fine. I took a cool picture I'll post when we get home, since I failed to bring the camera cable.

It rained hard again on the way back to our sweet cabin (I think this place is bigger than my house), but when it stopped we went swimming. Then I drove the one-hour round trip to town to get pizza for dinner.

Yeah, that's a bit of a lament, that we're so far out of Gatlinburg. It's not really a full half hour to get to town or a park entrance, but it's not close, either.

Tomorrow we're tackling white water rafting, and then I think I need to do laundry already. (We had to pack light due to reduced trunk space in the hybrid--but it's worth it to get 37+ mpg!) I'll give an injury report afterward. :)

Power of Suggestion, or...

I had my annual exam last Friday. My doctor felt fullness re: my left ovary and scheduled a pelvic ultrasound.

So I did that yesterday. They asked me a few times about feeling pain, and I said nope, not at all.

Guess what I have today?

So It's Mondays

I seem to have fallen into a Monday blogging habit. Is this the only time I can get it in gear? Apparently. Monday is like the New Year's Day of the week. Or something.

~~~~~~~~~
I blogged at Supernatural Sisters today, a list of things that would be worse than bad Supernatural. I couldn't come up with much, so I added ways that Supernatural could be made irredeemably bad. Check it out and weigh in!

~~~~~~~~~
The Summer Plan so far is doing okay. Not perfect. Last week Number One and I worked out Monday-Wednesday, as planned, while Number Two was at her band lessons. But she wouldn't get out of bed today (she did her therapy and a bike ride afterward). Last week we managed to clean all the rooms, mostly on schedule. I skipped my office, which BADLY needs it, and pushed the kitchen to Friday. I also bribed the kids into cleaning out the litter boxes for extra allowance. \o/

BUT. *sigh* The "work" period of the day seems to fill up with junk, or stuff that's not junk, that needs to be done, but isn't "work." I got all my paid work done and have a little lull, but I'm trying to do a crit for a friend and things keep interfering. Like the migraine I got last night. I finally got around to starting to plan for vacation--we leave in 5 days--but not for Father's Day, because my bank just changed its name and therefore its website and will not let me in.

So have I written yet this summer?

That's a big NOPE.

Of course, at the moment, I have no reason to write, as I wait for various people to do various things. I have a bunch of books already written and in various stages, but no direction because I don't know what's going to happen next. As soon as one of six people gets back to me, I'll have a better idea, and will have a hard-core reason to structure my time in a particular way.

Right now, though, I must take my kids bowling, to assuage the guilt of leaving them alone two weekdays in a row while I combined doctor's appointments with errands.

Is your summer going according to plan?

Quote Quiz

Supernatural Sisters has a quote quiz with a prize! Head over and test your obsession level knowledge of the show!

Judgment Call

I just read something tantalizing and I need some advice from my peeps!

I admit, I loved Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles primarily because of Brian Austin Green. I was devastated when he was shot, and therefore not all that disappointed when the show was canceled.

Now he's reportedly going to be on One Tree Hill this fall. It doesn't sound like a huge role (Nathan's sports agent?) but I'm gonna watch anyway.

The question is, should I now DVD 6 seasons of the show this summer in preparation? Would I like it? Would it be necessary for watching season 7?

Any viewpoint welcome! Thank you!

BTW

My finger is fine. Once in a while, the joints feel crampy when I put pressure on them laterally, so I'm expecting "fine" to not last that long, but the trauma has healed completely.

I love my keyboard (Microsoft Wireless Keyboard 7000) and the mouse is mostly cool, just doesn't glide across the surface as smoothly as I want. I keep forgetting to take it up to rub dry soap on the little pads.

I miss Supernatural like crazy. True Blood is good so far (but only 2 episodes in) but it's not easing the pain.

Terminator: Salvation was excellent. I love the kid who plays Kyle Reese (also Chekov in Star Trek) and can't wait to see him in new stuff. I'd heard several people hated the ending, so I was prepared and therefore didn't hate it.

Can't wait to see The Proposal this week. I have a feeling Betty White steals the movie.

Starting summer schedule this week. Plan is as follows:

8:00 Drop Number Two at mallet percussion lesson
8:06 Work out with Number One at Planet Fitness
8:45 Pick up Number Two
9:00 Check e-mail and plan work for the day
10:00 Clean designated rooms
11:00 Work
2:00 Do fun plans with the kids
4:00 Write

We'll see how well that works out.

A Little Rant

One quick thing before I head off to add to my work in progress...

You can't graduate from kindergarten, or eighth grade, or whatever arbitrary break in grades moves you from one school to another.

Six-year-olds in shiny caps and gowns are adorable. They finished their first year of school, and yay, they're on to big-kid classes where they actually get to learn stuff. Sixth or eighth or even ninth graders (my junior high was 8th and 9th, high school 10th-12th, and we didn't have a ceremony that I remember in between) are transitioning to, usually, a new level of responsibility and perspective and challenge.

But they haven't completed anything. In most states, they are required by law to go on to the next grade level. You don't get a diploma until you finish all of the requirements of high school, and then you're graduating.

Someone could probably pull out a dictionary definition that proves me wrong, and I admit this is just a peevish opinion, but it's been bugging me. Being able to "graduate" from every grade kind of diminishes the final accomplishment, doesn't it? That's why I was so pleased with Step Up to High School--that's exactly what it is, with equal emphasis on the achievements to date and the goals to come. The celebration is warranted, but in the right way.

I place too much importance on word choice, I guess. But, hey, that's my job! LOL

Decisions Rewarded

Ten years ago, when we started looking to buy a house, there were two school districts we were willing to move into. I'd been listening and watching and learning over the nine years we'd lived in the area, and we were determined to move into the one that gave the best educational framework for my kids.

It's the best feeling to have a decision like that borne out.

Honestly, determining such a thing is not easy. Without having direct experience with a system, you can't possibly know how it will play out. Things change. And one person's excellence is another person's nightmare.

Today Number One had an awards ceremony and then a Step Up to High School ceremony. The awards ceremony was only for half her class (they divide into academic teams, and keep things spread pretty even among them). And I didn't keep any quantifiable stats or anything. But it was pretty impressive.

First, they had students in orchestra, band, and chorus stand. Fully three-fourths of the students were on their feet for the applause. I think that's pretty amazing in a world where music and arts are systematically being erased from schools to accommodate all the standardized testing and reduced budgets.

At the Step Up ceremony, the guidance counselor read each student's name, then some of their self-listed achievements and interests, one word to describe themselves, and their goals for the future (I talked about the goals part on GabWagon today).

Some of the words the kids chose were pretty interesting. Gregarious? Enigmatic? How are they so self-aware? Even if they didn't pick the words themselves...my daughter said she didn't know what to choose, because she didn't want to pick something everyone else was saying, so her friend told her to say "authentic" because she's very genuine. Okay, how many eighth graders are that tuned into their friends? Maybe a lot, I don't know. I didn't have that many friends in eighth grade, and none close enough to say stuff like that. That's something I'd say to a friend now.

The counselor impressed me, too. Not all the kids were there, but he never missed a beat. He glanced at the next student, knew instantly who it was, and turned to their page--about 275 times or so. He never missed a step--even for the kids who were new this year. Sure, he's been this class's counselor for three years, but he said it was his first class, so it wasn't like he'd developed a system over decades. Plus, I tend to think of guidance counselors as concentrating on the kids with difficulties at home, or behavior or academic issues, or on the student council and stuff. He knew every. single. kid. And what's more...he knew their nicknames. Not even just Jay for Jarrell--he knew Carlie for Margaret.

That says a lot about how a school approaches its job.

Finally, the principal at the end said he was ditching the rest of his speech and talking off the cuff. He said this was the most respectful class of its peers he'd seen. An hour and a half of reading names and attributes, a lot of them the same, and there wasn't shuffling, or murmuring, or whispering or laughing or anything. They all sat quietly and paid attention. 275 teenagers.

Now, I know they're not perfect. Kids fight and ditch classes. One of the boys picked the word "godly" to describe himself. A student has been hospitalized or under treatment for depression for much of this school year. We don't escape the negatives, of course.

But I got all warm inside when a few students thanked their classmates for making it so easy to relocate from other states (especially when one boy said the kids here are much nicer than the kids in Texas! heee!). And I gave heartfelt thanks that my husband and I made the decision we did, and found the house we found, and that my kids are getting the education I'd always hoped they'd get.

I only hope other parenting decisions bear out the same way. Time will tell.

Oh, Well, Maybe Tomorrow?

I opened my WIP yesterday.

*pauses for recognition of momentousness*

Okay, okay, it's not all that momentous. But it's been two weeks, so it felt good to get into the story again. I barely had time to read through the last chapter and finish editing the parts I was editing, but I did do it. I was actually thinking I could finish by my self-imposed deadline of next Friday (it's a writer's group goals thing). 3,000 words a day is doable.

Then today happened.

And it was a good day, it just kind of...gobbled.

Had to get up at 7 for a soccer game at 9. Watched game (great game, despite the 1-0 loss, Number Two had some spectacular saves in goal). Took kids to get brunch, drove 45 minutes to game 2. Watched game. Cheered Number One when she stepped on field first time since MCL tear. Cheered again when she kicked ball. Stopped obnoxious behavior.

Wow, I must be tired. Look how I abbreviated my sentences more and more.

After 12:30 game (won 9-0), stopped to get lunch and drove to game 3, which was still Number One. We had about 15 minutes at home, enough time for her to ice her knee and declare it fine. The weather was absolutely gorgeous, but I forgot to sunscreen my arms and they burned, and I didn't spread the SPF broadly enough so burned my chest and neck a little. Serves me right for being lackadaisical. She won that game, too (5-1) and still felt fine when we got home (with gelati).

But then we had to go get my car that we'd left in the game 1 parking lot, and I was hungry (gelati's a cool dinner but not filling enough), and then I checked e-mail for the first time all day, and now it's 10:00 and maybe I'm getting old, or maybe it's just too difficult to shift my routine back to how it was 3 years ago when I know it's not strictly necessary, but I have no energy for writing.

You know what kind of effort it took to make all of those complete sentences?

Wrapping Up the Season

I just did my first writing since I got back from the retreat. I know! Lazy bum. Well, not really. But I finally found time to focus.

The weather isn't really helping with that. I think I've said here how annoyed I get when people claim cold weather is evidence against global warming, and I argue that the planet doesn't just uniformly get warmer, it's an average increase, and it causes instability. Well, man, have we got that this spring!

The long weekend was beautiful. Got a little hot. Ran the A/C all weekend. Tuesday dawned 30 degrees cooler. Number One complained of the cold on Wednesday morning, so I let her turn the heat back on. I wore a friggin' sweater to work yesterday, and was glad I did, because though they predicted 73 degrees, it never really got above 60. Last night and this afternoon we had thunderous storms that made me fear for my basement, as the unclogged gutters were overwhelmed by sheer volume. Thunderstorms! In May! An hour after that, Number Two and I were outside in shorts playing ladderball in the sun. Totally schizophrenic, and it makes me afraid.

Anyway. The season I'm REALLY here to talk about is the TV season, though it essentially ended two weeks ago. I can't let it pass without my thoughts.

I was really glad that Castle and Dollhouse got renewed. Castle's cliffhanger wasn't that huge as cliffhangers go, but I have to have answers. Plus, the show got better and better as it went, and I'm glad ABC is, uncharacteristically, giving it time to grow. Gladder that I get to keep watching Nathan Fillion. :)

Dollhouse didn't grab most people, but I find the intertwining elements so dang intriguing, I can't wait to see what happens next. What compels me the most is how someone like Ballard can get drawn in, when he was so against it in the beginning. And his decision to get November/Katie released instead of Caroline was heartwarming. I was happy for her, and it was good for us moralizing fans to see that she remembered nothing, was fully accepting of her decision to give them the time and her body/brain to use. You could tell, though, that she didn't get what she wanted out of it. For her, no time had passed. Therefore, there was no easing of the grief that had driven her there in the first place.

The Mentalist surprised me, that they took us so close to Red John. It will be interesting to see if they get us closer next year, or resolve it. Stuff like that dragged over more than two years gets boggy.

The Numb3rs finale was awesome. It trumps the other awesome Numb3rs finale, when Colby was revealed to be a traitor, only because of the ending, which I totally called and was soooo happy to see them follow through with.

Let's see, what else? Glad Chuck got a pickup--of sorts--because of the gamechanger with the new intersect. Chuck's decision and new skills bring a new maturity and open up a huge range of possibilities. Disappointed that we have to wait so long, even more over the few episodes it gets, but oh, well.

OH. LOST! How could I forget that one? I'm so pissed about Juliet, but I have no idea where they're going next and I can. not. wait. for next season. Of course, that's a killer wait, too.

There are a few new shows that look worth trying (Glee was awesome, looking forward to that one; Vampire Diaries I have to try for some reason) but I'll have a lot less on my slate in the fall.

In the meantime, I'll finish up Harper's Island and wait eagerly for the return of Eureka and Leverage and premiere of Royal Pains, because I like Mark Feurstein.

What will you be doing with your free time this summer?

Surfing

I blogged today at Romance University, all about applying the pirate's code to your romance career. There's a prize drawing going on, too! Check it out!

And if you're surfing, looking for interesting stuff, stop by Supernatural Sisters, where we posted an interview with Betsy Morris, screenwriter of Ten Inch Hero. She shares what it's like to be a screenwriter (very similar to being a novelist, actually) and gives us some insight into Jensen Ackles' character.

While you're at it, for huge laughs check out Jody Wallace's interviews at I Read Romance and Jess Granger's Butterfly Blog. Seriously, don't drink while you read.

Retreat Craziness

Oddly, all the craziness--or, at least, all the craziness I captured--was on Saturday.

First, we wanted to go for a post-dinner walk. But the weather wasn't quite cooperative. So Mandy suggested we use the excellent canvas bags Joyce and Kristine gifted us with:



But it cleared up for a while, so we managed to get out.

Then we hazed Elizabeth.



She was a new member on her first retreat! Had to do something! Actually, someone said something about how we should make someone lie down on a grave, and she volunteered. Said it was peaceful.

Remember the weird circle from two years ago?



It's still there.



Misty decided the weird circle demanded more weirdness, though.



Supernatural fans know what a weird circle in a cemetery means, but the only zombie we encountered was Megan:



Vicki demonstrated how NOT to ride a playground dog:



And then we went to the other cemetery, which we haven't done before. I don't know, it's just not as creepy without the fence:



I don't think we'll be going back. I mean, how much fun is a cemetery if you can't bring coat hangers?



Saturday night we played our game. Here's Beth, posing after she won putting Johnny Depp together, defaced as he was.



We laughed harder than at any other retreat game, and that's saying something. Joyce hyperventilated and had to sit down:



Gotta love David Beckham as Spock played by @ZacharyQuinto.



We were equal opportunity defacers, of course:



But honest, among all the insanity, we did work!



Now, don't you want to have a retreat of your own?

Finally, My Thoughts on "Lucifer Rising"

Because I know you were all hanging out here with bated breath waiting. LOL

Stuff that's mostly response to other people's stuff:

I did not take Azazel's words literally. I was kind of surprised to see so many recaps state that he was Lucifer's son. But remember back in "Sin City," the demon talked about Lucifer as someone to have faith in, much like God is to humans (and angels). I took Azazel to be calling Lucifer his father in a worshipful manner, just like people refer to God.

Many people are having a hard time with the depiction of certain angels. I'm thinking Uriel's and Zachariah's performances (well, Robert's and Kurt's performances) are just so powerful, they feel bigger. But really, of all the angels we've met, two are on our side, two don't care about humanity. That's even. Plus, all the angels Uriel killed were unwilling to join his plan.

As for that plan...how is it any different from war in real life? The only difference I see is that the world leaders who engage in war pay lip service to caring about the people who actually put their lives on the line and die for the effort. Zachariah doesn't pretend to care about humans. He wants what he wants. I think it's a very deft metaphor, intentional or not.

Pop culture references... I can buy Zachariah figuring out what might appeal to a guy he wants to keep compliant, plus, he's got psychic ability, so some unimportant stuff is going to leak in there. Upper management always has time on its hands once it's done delegating--he probably tuned in to Gladiator one night when he was bored. Likewise, we know Dean soaks up late night TV, and The Suite Life of Zach and Cody seems to be on 24/7. I can totally picture Dean flipping around, pausing, and being unable to look away in horror.

The idea of God being in absentia is intriguing, and keeps drawing me back to the Incarnations of Immortality series by Piers Anthony. I read it at a crucial time in my spiritual development, and Supernatural is echoing some themes the Incarnations addresses. Megan thinks God is actually orchestrating everything, just from afar, and no one knows that he's involved, which is also a theory I can get behind.

Some people also seem to think Dean left that message that Sam heard. One write-up said he'd left it before he left the one we saw him leave, but no way Dean went that far. Plus, look at Ruby. How would she know what Sam was hearing, if she hadn't had something to do with it?

I thought Castiel was going to offer angel blood for Dean, for a moment, and in that instant, it was one of those "OMG that's perfect symmetry" moments. But of course, thinking about it, Dean would never have done it. Or, not easily. Woulda been hot, though. *stares into space*

Where was I? Oh. Right. Finale.

The "why it had to be Sam" thing seems pretty clear to me. It wasn't, like, destined that he'd be the one. He just came out on top all the way through the journey. Azazel was still setting up kids even after Sam and his "kind" were maturing and coming into their powers (remember Rosie?). Plus, he didn't have the Colt. He needed the most powerful kid AND the Colt, and that came together with Jake. Jake was the one who let Lilith out of Hell. But Sam killed him, so he couldn't go on to the end game, and Sam was the last one available. They had all the pieces lined up: Lilith out and breaking seals, and one guy with the demon-created ability to kill her and free Lucifer. That's why it had to be Sam.

The only thing I'm uncertain of is the archangel. Is he coming after Castiel because he somehow thinks Cas is a threat to Chuck? I don't know why, because they didn't threaten him. Or, did Chuck aiding and abetting the disobedient twosome render his prophet status null and void, and the archangel was coming after all who'd violated that? Whose side is the archangel on?

I can't wait to see what the aftermath of that confrontation was.

Ruby, ah, Ruby. I always like the characters who defy the "rules," even the self-imposed rules of a contained world like in Supernatural. So I'd hoped Ruby was at least partly good. That she somehow cared about the boys, or at least Sam, even though I was pretty sure her end goal was very self-serving. By the end of LR, though, I wanted her gone. Stabbed in the gut by Dean while Sam held her in place. Well how about that! That's what I got! LOL

In just a few seconds, they made it right. It's not right, of course. Dean broke the first seal, Sam broke the second, they've got a lot to atone for, even if just in their own minds. They fought, and meant it. It can't be glossed over, so the journey "back" (I put that in quotes because it's really a journey to better, not back, they can never go back) will be a long, hard one. But they had one important moment of working together, of apology and acceptance, of being side by side, touching, bridging the chasm, and facing the evil together. It was perfect.

I'll save speculation about next season for another post. But man, I can't wait.

Release Day!

It's been a while since I had a release! But for all you paperback lovers who, like me, prefer to hold a real book in your hands over reading digital ink, Indulgence II is here!

I know, lame title. I'm a lame titler, what can I say? But I've always claimed my work is indulgent fiction, designed for pleasure reading, escapism, fantasizing over possible...shall we say...alternate realities. :) Indulgence is more appropriate than ever with these stories:

Indulge yourself once again in scorching fantasy. Fall in love with a younger man, a rock star, a superhero, or an emotionally tortured savior of abducted children.

Previously available only in electronic format, these four novellas of pure escapism have now been combined for a paperback edition! Included are the titles...

Letting Go
Inspired a little by all the talk amongst my friends and online acquaintances about the wrongness of attraction to a man young enough to be your son. :)

Rebuilding Forever
This one's a sequel to Lost Our Forever (e-book and also found in Indulgence, but you don't really have to have read that one to enjoy this one. This is the closest I've ever come to male/male erotica. Seth and Julian are just so delicious!

Renegade
For my Supernatural friends out there, Jake and Dan are not Dean and Sam, but are definitely inspired by them.

Under Control
Reluctant superhero. Nuff said?

(Full descriptions and excerpts for each story
are available by clicking on the above links!)

The paperback is available at the publisher's site here, or directly from Amazon here. If you are local to me, I've ordered a few to sell, so let me know if you're interested in a signed copy at a slight discount. I know! Bargain! :)

Have a lovely holiday weekend!

Book Fair for Boys

Agent Awesome has been talking about the Book Fair for Boys by Guys Lit Wire. They're doing a drive to obtain books for kids who really need them. I know you're bombarded with worthy causes, but encourage anyone who believes in:

1. The importance of books in life, in any shape or form
2. The importance of giving at-risk kids (or worse) choices and chances

to check it out and see if you can help.

~~~~~~~~~~~~
Stay tuned for posts with:

--Photos from the retreat craziness
--My thoughts on the Supernatural finale
--Comments on the Upfronts and other finales
--Lament about the spoiling I might have just done to myself re: Prison Break, which I have not yet watched and won't for a while due to the NBA Playoffs
--Some other stuff

Romance University Launches Today

Romance University’s three weekly topics include:

Monday – Crafting Your Career
NJD note: I have an interview in this category next week! It focuses on my "A Pirate's Guide to a Successful Publishing Career" workshop.

Wednesday – Anatomy of the Male Mind

Friday – Chaos Theory of Writing

RU’s purpose is to:

Empower Writers. Entertain Readers. Understand Men.

Don’t miss our upcoming visiting professors: Lori Foster, Jessica Inclán, Donald Maass, Brenda Novak, Alicia Rasley, Christie Ridgway, Loucinda McGary, Natalie J. Damschroder, Blake Snyder, Theresa Stevens, Leslie Wainger, and several men who will share the male perspective on romance, love and sex.

Stop by Monday (TODAY) to chat with Brenda Novak, who will head the class with details about her road to becoming a New York Times bestselling author. Leave a comment and your name will be entered in a drawing to win a $50 gift certificate and a tote full of goodies.

WAIT! We have more good news.

Would you like to win a nifty new iPod Nano? Leave a comment during our launch week, May 18 - 22, and your name will be entered in a separate drawing. Courtesy of RU’s faculty members (Adrienne Giordano, Kelsey Browning and Tracey Devlyn).

Romance University – A place where friends are made and dreams are realized
www.RomanceUniversity.org

Problems?

Someone just told me they were having problems with my blog. Is anyone else? Like, having a whole bunch of windows opening unexpectedly? If you are, let me know! I want to fix it, if I can.

Thanks!

Bye-Bye!

We have this corner cupboard in the kitchen. It's above the countertop, and you know how they are--wedge-shaped, very deep, and very difficult to get into. So last weekend were were collecting things for the Post Office's canned food drive, and I said there might be some things in there. Sure enough, we found some things.

That expired in 2003.

But that's nothing. We have Vicks Vap-o-Rub that expired in 1999 in the medicine chest. Don't ask why it's still there.

Okay, so, I'm off. Not quite yet. I'm about done with my computer stuff and packing my work items (laptop, Neo, updated iPod, etc.), so I'm going upstairs to pack and then I'll be offline (kind of) until Monday morning!

I'm so excited!

Where the H*** Have I Been?

I was thinking, "How did I keep up with blogging when I had a full-time day job?" Then I looked and...I didn't.

Speaking of blogs, go check out Romance University. They soft-launched today and start out next week with Brenda Novak. I'm a guest professor on 5/26.

My days seem unendingly busy. I finish an editing job, feel relief for about 3.2 seconds, and another one pops in. Which is great--everything is great, I really can't complain. But I'm exhausted.

Luckily, it's T-minus 33 hours and counting until the retreat! At which I won't be blogging, probably. But the break is most definitely needed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm tired of negativity. Especially about something as unimportant as TV. Yes, entertainment is vital, and yes, it's not unimportant to those who make their living creating it. But srsly, I just want to watch and enjoy, and not feel icky because other people I don't really know are whining about stuff I love.

Which is not a rant against them, they are entitled to say what they want. I just need to avoid it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Here's the post I wrote yesterday but didn't get to upload until today:

I hope everyone had a nice Mother's Day, despite pet problems and in-law invasions. No one deserves crap on the one day a year they get celebrated. Whether that crap is doggie diarrhea or passive-aggressive attacks on your character.

I had a fabulous day. I got breakfast made for me. It was funny--Saturday, on the way to the City Islanders soccer game, we saw that our very favorite bagel place is now open on Sunday. So I requested Bob's Bagels, and they drove over early...and found a sign on the door, "closed for Mother's Day."

I got a gift card for Amazon (hopefully--the store didn't activate it, so J's taking it back today) and the keyboard that shipped last night (hopefully it arrives before I leave for the retreat, but it's not looking good), and we had dinner at Passage to India after a gorgeous hike at the environmental site near the schools.

I also got to see Star Trek, which was so good I'm sorry I already saw it.

But let me back up. Friday night I dragged J to see Wolverine. It was great. Very well acted and structured, though I wanted a lot more Bradley, Wade, and Remy. I definitely want more Remy. I hope they do a Gambit movie next. Anyway, it was well done for a film that was basically rehashing everything we already knew, and the bit after the credits was shiver-worthy, well worth hanging around for.

Saturday we had soccer all day. The Islanders won again, which was cool. Even cooler was the Pittsburgh goalie getting red-carded. The goalie got a red card!!!!

I caught up slightly on TV this weekend, though I'm still way behind. It's okay, because the finale season makes me sad. Pretty much everything is over already, over this week, or ending next week/soon. The longer it takes me to watch, the longer I can stretch the season.

The Scrubs finale was perfectly done, though I'd have liked to see Cox's friend played by Brendan Fraser. I was very misty-eyed through most of it.

Alan Tudyk? Evil? Never thought he would make me so scared. Gah! But I love him more than ever.

So, back to Star Trek. I've never been much of a Trekkie. Casual fan. Never really saw the original, but absorbed enough to "get" the jokes/tropes/commonalities, etc. I did watch some TNG and all the movies. This one is by far the best of them.

First, I want to give kudos to the casting director and anyone else involved in that. It could not be more perfect. The only actor who didn't completely emulate a young version of his predecessor was Chris Pine as Kirk, and I can't say that a true fan wouldn't find him lacking, but I didn't. I didn't expect Karl Urban to do McCoy so well, nor did I think I could divorce Quinto from Sylar. It helped that I haven't watched Heroes for a couple of years, but even my husband, who still watches it, said he was perfect.

The plot made me squee. It connected the franchise with its past/future, grounded the characters and us in a new present, and set up a completely blank slate so they can do anything they want with additional movies.

The details were delightful. Accents and lines and mannerisms and the vastness of space, the relationships they established, the motivations...I don't know how they managed to do it all, but they did. And I have to admit, I never saw the red shirt coming. That's completely on me, because it's not like they didn't throw hints at us like darts. But the action was so very much modern adventure, all I could do was stare in exhilaration.

Anyway, go watch it. If this is at all your kind of movie, you won't be disappointed.

OMFG

I thought I was broken.

It's been a rough week, and we all know last week's episode was incredibly draining and hard, and I kept saying I couldn't do it, I couldn't watch the rest.

And today I actually thought about not watching it. I had no positive anticipation, just dread. I really felt like I could walk away and never watch it again.

Do I need to tell you I'm glad I didn't?

It's late, I'm very tired, and this week's ep was again very draining. I was het up a few minutes ago, but I fade fast nowadays. Bottom line: expect this post to be all over the place.

First, Number One and I had a brainstorming moment:

Ruby: [Lilith's] older than she looks.

Number One: But in season three, Tammy said she was a new up-and-comer in town.

Me: Well, maybe she was just new on earth.

My brain: Except she was on earth when she collected Ruby, even though that was hundreds of years ago.

Me: Or had to wait to start breaking seals until certain things were in place, like Samhain can only be raised every 600 years.

My brain: ...but hundreds of seals...can't be timing re: Samhain, jus tuse other seal...wait, what else was timing...In the Beginning...Aza--

Me: Gasp! *grabs Number One's arm*

Number One: *stares at me* Your hand is warm. Please remove it.

Me: The demon gate to hell! Lilith was in hell until Jake opened the gate! That was Azazel's plan for all that time, he was trying to get things into place to open the gate and get Lilith out! Because she was the only one who could free Lucifer!

So now it seems pretty obvious, and I'm sure most of you already thought of it. I mean, Lilith appeared after the gate opened (though many episodes after). Castiel said in "In the Beginning" that they were trying to work out Azazel's end game, and that it was tied to Lilith. The clues have been there all along, so... Anyway, it felt like a revelation to me.

Lilith eats babies. Of course. And OMGgross.

Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki knocked it out of the park. Incredible performances, especially Jared, being alone most of the time. I can't imagine withdrawal is easy to portray, what with the twitching and all.

Sam being flung around the edge of the panic room might just be the best damned stunt they've ever done.

When Castiel told Anna he had orders to set Sam free, I figured that means Dean has to save the world from Armageddon by somehow defeating Sam in some special way. It's another thing that seems obvious--if indeed it's right--but I've been fighting the whole brother-vs-brother idea very hard all season. Still, it's very Cain and Abel, so it feels right.

Anyone else think Bobby wasn't Bobby for a while? When he was telling Dean they were killing Sam, and maybe they should let him out and use him to stop Lilith, and so on, I just couldn't buy that the words were coming out of Bobby's mouth. And when Dean said no, no way, this was the line he would not cross, and Bobby looked at Dean...he looked just like Zachariah. So I'm thinking Zachariah possessed Bobby.

Now, of course, there's the whole anti-possession tattoo thing. Bobby's GOT to have one. But those charms and tattoos are to prevent demon possession. No one knew or believed the angels even existed. Plus, I think Z is powerful enough to bypass it. I know he talks to Dean next week, so maybe he'll confirm if I'm right on this.

If I'm wrong, then...bad writing, Sera. OOC beyond justification, and you all know how much I can justify. :)

But that brings me to the preview for next week.

MAJOR SPOILERS (PROMO-RELATED) FOR NEXT WEEK, PLUS SPECULATION

Sam's eyes go black. Two possibilities--he's crossed over to Monster!Sam, or he's possessed. But he has the tattoo, and Lilith said she couldn't do anything to him. Then, at the end, he says he's been waiting for this for a very long time. Well, that doesn't fit Sam, so it points to possession again. The words indicate Lilith, but that doesn't seem possible.

So I'm thinking Lucifer. I know, that doesn't suit the black eyes, but it fits everything else. It fits the "wait for long time" thing, it fits the rules of possession--Lucifer isn't a demon, either, he's an angel, and maybe a fallen one, but presumably pretty powerful--and the damned episode is titled "Lucifer Rising." If they're gonna send Dean to hell, why wouldn't they raise Lucifer? And all supernatural beings need a body to walk the earth. Lucifer would totally pick Gigantor Sam.

OOooooohhhh...I just had another thought. We've all assumed Ruby has something else in mind for Sam, right? That she probably doesn't just have simple revenge on her mind.

I bet she's been prepping Sam to host Lucifer.

OMFG.

Random Sunday

I'm not in the market for a new laptop yet, but I'm dreaming. The problem is, I hatehatehate the trackpad and that it pushes the keyboard so far back from the front of the casing. I could use a separate keyboard, but that kind of defeats the purpose of traveling light. So I'm wondering if anyone out there is aware of a laptop that either is laid out differently, with the keyboard to the front, or one with a detachable keyboard.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My dog doesn't bark much. She does this little howl thing when she's outside and wants to come in, or when she'd happy or hungry or excited. She only does those warning barks when the oil guy comes to fill the tank.

So the other day, as I was finishing my shower, I heard her bark, loud and sharp. My first thought?

Why don't I keep salt in the bathroom?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So I think my finger/hand will be okay. It gets aggravated a lot when I work the day job, which requires a lot of toggling (between programs) and puts lateral pressure on my middle finger. And if I'm not careful and try to hold or carry something heavy with that finger, it hurts a lot. But overall things are improving.

Slowly, though, because nothing is really helping. I got a finger kit that had a splint--that put too much pressure on the knuckle and when I took it off made it unbendable, stiff, and sore--and straps to buddy my fingers--which helped mostly at night except they'd slide off so I used tape anyway, and of course I can't type with them so I don't use them during the day--and a cool gel-freeze sleeve with a gauze finger cover for protection, that works excellently but doesn't stay cold for more than 10 minutes. *sigh* At least the kit didn't cost too much.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My Twitter resistance is thinning. I really don't need more time sucks, as far as following people, and I don't have enough short things to say, the opportunity to post them, or the memory to do so even if I come up with ideas and opportunity.

But I almost caved this week. Someone started twitting whom I have a vested interest in following. But I settled down and just bookmarked her page.

You won't get me, Twitter! *shakes fist*

No, She Wasn't

(Spoilers for last night. If you don't know what I'm talking about, then you don't care anyway. LOL)

Everyone is saying that when Jimmy's wife went off screen for a few seconds and came running back with a blanket (or whatever), that's when she was possessed. Immediately.

I say no she wasn't.

I'm not saying all those who believe she was are wrong. I'm just deliberately choosing to disagree.

First, the whole thing was heartbreaking enough. I can't stand the idea that the scene at the car wasn't real. So that's the illogical, emotional reason I say no, she wasn't.

Logistically, it doesn't quite fit, either. This episode wasn't flawless with the details. There were a few little things that didn't work. But five seconds isn't quite enough, especially when the black smoke would have had to enter her--the guys would have noticed that. Doesn't it make more sense that it happened as they drove away? I don't think we actually have her off screen, but there could have been a moment between leaving in the Impala and while they waited for Sam to do the hotwiring when she was out of view for it to happen.

If she did it right away, why wouldn't she just grab the kid again? Why go to all the trouble of letting them drive away, then calling them back? Doing so gave her time to call a couple of goon!demons to help, sure, but it also gave her a long time to try to fool three guys who are very attuned to demon possession. That's a big risk when you're trying to bide your time.

Oh, and why didn't the boys give her an anti-possession amulet? That frustrated me.

That's all I'm going to talk about here. I have really long comments on Trish's excellent recap/discussion at Supernatural Sisters, so head on over and join in! There is much angst, for sure.

Like a Book

My Middle Finger

Last week, the day before starting my new job, the first two fingers of my left hand ached a little in the middle knuckles (PIP joints), kind of a crampy pain. That night they woke me up throbbing and burning. That mostly subsided, but they were swollen and tender the next day. I assumed I'd damaged them when I crushed them between the laundry basket and the metal gate at the top of the stairs. 'Cause, you know, when you're 38, injuries don't manifest immediately. They sneak up after a day or two.

But then, after the weekend, when they still hurt, and in weird, inconsistent ways, I started to get worried. My friends all laughed at me when I said I was too young for arthritis, and my knees were bothering me, too. At first I'd blown that off because they do that from time to time. I'm fat. I haven't exercised in months way too long. It happens.

So I did a little quickie research on sudden-onset arthritis, and freaked right the hell out. I stopped before I read anything that was actually based on medical education. I can remain in denial as long as it's lay people on message boards.

The pain is mostly in the PIP joint of my middle finger now, though sometimes I have a little cramping-type pain in the DIP and PIP joints of the pointer and ring fingers. I can't decide if that's sympathetic pain, compensatory pain, or evidence of the onset of a condition that will soon render me a screaming invalid. Also, it sometimes feels like stinging, like it's the soft tissue around the joint rather than the joint itself, or like the skin is dry and raw, but there's nothing actually wrong with the skin.

Today, though, things are a little different. I did different work today, so I didn't use the finger as much on the keyboard or in the same way, so the overall ache wasn't as strong. That one PIP joint is swollen still, but it isn't hurting unless I use it, mainly if I pressure it laterally--like bracing a heavy bowl in that hand. I get a sharp pain in the joint and it actually felt like it popped out a little, and I clicked it back in.

So now I'm thinking fracture. Today, it feels an awful lot like the DIP joint of the same finger did when I jammed it playing football.

I guess only time will tell. (Yes, I could go get an x-ray, but 1. I don't have a doctor, 2. I have a high deductible plan and would have to pay for it, and 3. there's not much point because what can be done? I'll just try to find a splint to use so I stop trying to carry heavy bowls with it.)

Oh, Sammy

I really loved "Jump the Shark" last night. My initial reaction to hearing that John had another son was just as negative as anyone else's, but I was sure Kripke and Co. would make me love it just like they've made me love everything else I hate. Of course, being unable to keep away from spoilers meant I know Jake Abel was only cast for one episode so I figured he was going to die. But how it happened TOTALLY surprised me. And shocked me.

Things I loved:

1. The opening scene before the boys. Hell-llo, creepy Supernatural. The whole bed/foot shot was ultra-tense. There were a few other moments like that, too, especially with Dean in the crypt.

2. The opening scene with the boys. Sam brushing his teeth--YES! We need more everyday stuff like that! Next up: Buying rock salt at Wal Mart. Right, Megan? :) Dean waking up, being a ten-year-old boy with his rumbly tummy--and tuna! Ha! And the phone call...

3. Dean. I tried to be more specific, but it was just everything. Dean being so furious and positive that it was a trap (and it was, even though it wasn't a lie). His emotions were so pure--God DAMN it, Jensen needs an Emmy. Then when Adam managed to convince them, he just as furiously was determined to protect him and make sure he didn't get sucked into the life. It shows incredible personal strength and maturity to have so much pain (baseball games!) and personal regret and still recognize that Adam wasn't to blame for it. When Sam started to tell Adam the truth, and Dean exploded with "Sammy!" instead of Sam--there's so much vulnerability there.

4. The glimpse into the past. We were seeing the hunt from John's point of view for pretty much the first time. Working with the bartender, finding the bodies, hunting the thing. And then falling for the local nurse and later finding out he had a son. It DOES make sense, because you can't have 23 years of complete focus. John had to have had detours and layovers and stuff, and parents always have lives their kids don't really see.

I also loved how they brought in the ambivalence of hunting again, without being too heavy handed. There was just one mention of it--that ghouls don't (normally) kill, there was nothing evil about taking those bodies, but John hunted and killed the thing, anyway. Cause and effect, because if the kids hadn't grown up alone, they might not have warped enough to decide to go after fresh meat, and use revenge as a motivator/justifier.

5. The rock/paper/scissors moment was sheer perfection, all the way through.

Things that made me have to work a little to find them okay:

1. Adam's body looked a little too intact. They feed on the bodies, and they talked about how they ate him. But I might have just not looked hard enough, and maybe they're grazers. You know, eat a little bit at a time, frequently.

2. Why Sam didn't use his demon mojo to get free. I thought of it at the time, and we talked about it later. I decided he hadn't had a fix for a while, so his power had waned.

3. Why it took them so long to go after anyone. I didn't think of this myself when I watched, it was mentioned elsewhere, but I think they explained it in their duonologue (monologue with two people *g*). They were very young children when their father died. They needed to survive first, and the anger and need to act would have grown over time, fed by their aloneness and exposure to the world. Then they had to figure out what happened and come up with a plan.

The part I really don't like:

Sam. Oh, Sammy. I love you, but I'm not liking you much at the moment. The things he said aren't outrageous. He started down this path way back in season 2. Remember in "Playthings," right after he saved Susan, how he said there was no time to coddle her, they had to figure it out. It was a change from his usual compassion and gentle prodding. In "Malleus Maleficarum" and "Fresh Blood" he was more absolute, more ready to do what needed to be done without trying for nicer alternatives. He was trying to be more like Dean. And, of course, in "Jus in Bello" he was willing to sacrifice Nancy.

But now...it's different. He's not tempered by "greater good" anymore. Nancy's death would have saved all her friends, and he was weighing multiple lives over one. It wasn't that he didn't care about Nancy, but that he thought the choice was hers to make, and a sound one. With Adam, though...God, he called him meat. He's becoming Gordon, wanting to kill anything he can label evil. His rage and pain and hatred for Lilith have drowned the Sammy I love.

Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suff-er-ing.

Not that Luke ever really listened to Yoda, either.

Ten or eight or even six episodes ago I never would have believed they could make me buy Sam going dark side. It was way too foreign to the character they'd established. But they've slowly but surely transitioned him, fully backing the change with tons of motivation and logic, and fueling it with fabulous acting by Jared Padalecki, direction by the directors, and writing by the writers.

This whole thing is the epitome of a love/hate relationship!

My Schedule

Man, am I struggling. It's ridiculous to even sound like I'm complaining, because many, many people have a more insane schedule than I do. I used to have one, myself. And things could be a helluva lot worse. I can focus fully on the day job while I'm there. But once I'm home, I'm trying to give the kids my attention while not letting my freelance work slide. Then we have the evening schedule, school needs, and household crap (most of which is falling way, way, way by the wayside, I admit). I'm getting the writing done, but it always comes last, and even then I'm making tradeoffs that make me feel guilty.

After this many years, after all my counseling to other authors, HOW do I let myself do this? When does intellect and conviction overwhelm programming and my actions prove that I *don't* believe everyone else is more important than I am? I hate taking on the martyr role, but can't seem to help myself. I guess it wells up in response to my natural selfishness.

So. Instead of writing this book blog, I should have been proofing the galley of my May release, Indulgence II, editing 40 pages of Fight or Flight, and reading Mandy's story to tell her I don't think she's a sell-out.

I have a feeling I'm just going to go upstairs, make a cup of hot cocoa with kahlúa and a bowl of popcorn, and catch up on some neglected TV. Then I'll try to do all of the above (plus 20 additional pages of FoF) tomorrow between the early soccer game, the late soccer game, the lawn mowing, and the house cleaning.

Wish me luck, and have a good weekend!

The Susan Boyle Thing

A columnist on Buddy TV posted that in an interview, Susan let slip that the producers of Britain's Got Talent came to her, that she didn't audition for the show. The essay and comments together are pretty interesting, both in the columnist's extreme reaction and the commenters unexpectedly balanced viewpoints.

If Susan is exploited and Simon and company make millions off of her but she gets nothing but limelight, that's unfair...but it would be unfair whether she went to them or they found her.

If Simon knew she was going to sound like that and therefore his reaction was not real, sure, that's disingenuous. But does it matter? I mean, he DID say he knew from the moment she set foot on the stage they were going to hear something special. It made us laugh, thinking he was joking, but it's even funnier if he was serious. And the show is entertainment, nothing more or less.

I think perception is what's important. Who cares if the producers of a reality show are *gasp* manipulating things? Everywhere I saw this video linked, people were inspired. Since I mostly hang out around writers, they were mostly inspired to keep working, keep trying--and THAT'S what will lead them to success, not someone else's precedent.

Too Tired to Think of a Decent Post Title

I've been posting so sporadically because of a few things. New schedule, thanks to taking on a part-time day job. That requires adjustment, plus reduces available time. I'm also in one of those weird periods when I don't really have anything to say.

On Friday, I took my kid to the park and, since none of the things on my to-do list were things I could do away from the computer, I spent nearly an hour on a long, rambling, no doubt supremely dull post that I don't even want to look at now, never mind upload.

So I'll talk about 17 Again. Number One loved it, and expected to. I had lower expectations, because it's an old premise and how many different ways can they do it? But I was very surprised to love it, also.

The basic story is what you'd expect. Guy hates his life, has screwed up everything, needs a reality check, so he gets to go back to the age when he thinks (rightly so) it all went awry. There aren't really any surprises in how things proceed. But there was so much to like:

1. The funny.
I laughed constantly. The best friend, as an adult, is hilariously horrible, but his subplot is precious. The dialogue is well written and often surprising.

2. The acting.
It's mostly Zac Efron that impresses. I knew he was a good actor from Hairspray, but he channels Matthew Perry without mimicry, making certain mannerisms and faces seem totally natural. All the secondary actors do a good job, too, even when they are written superficially (the obnoxious daughter who's making supremely stupid choices, the bully who treats her like shit, etc.). Michelle Trachtenberg was only annoying for a couple of scenes.

3. The character development.
Some people will probably find it facile, but I found it refreshing, with one exception. The opening flashback scenes give us a great sense of the main character, who is a good, hard-working, ambitious guy under the cockiness and joy. He doesn't really hesitate to make the right decision. When we flash forward twenty years, we're told that he's been complaining for all of them, blaming his wife for all his failures, etc. It seems too great a gap, especially when he turns 17 again and makes the right choices.

That's the part others will likely find facile that I find refreshing. He does misinterpret this second chance at first, but very quickly figures out his path and never really strays from it.

All in all, it was well worth the matinee price we paid, and a fun time. I heartily recommend it for anyone who needs a smile.

Random Monday

Wow, has it been way too long since my last regular post. If I thought this blog had any value/meaning/importance, I'd apologize. :)

I could blame my lack on the shocking death of Derek Reese on Terminator: TSCC. I wanted to be furious, but bringing the Connors in contact with Weaver was too intriguing and exciting (I haven't watched the finale yet). So I find myself dismayed over the probability that the show will be canceled, but then asking myself if I really care, because the episodes that were the best inevitably involved Derek (my favorite being the one where he found out about Jesse's plan, and maybe killed her, though that also happened to be the ep where John manned up, so...). Anyway, I guess if Derek won't be in it, I won't like it as much, so it's not as big a loss? Maybe.

Accompanying T:TSCC is Dollhouse, which I'm enjoying about as much as Buffy but not nearly as much as Firefly. It's probably in the top 5 of all the shows I watch. I'm really intrigued, though I do miss the quippiness--there's humor, but it's not of the usual Whedon style--and I'm even over my dislike of Eliza Dushku. I'm fascinated by how I'm simultaneously protective of the Dollhouse and wanting Ballard to take them down.

And I find myself charmed by Cupid. The couples he's working on are more interesting than he is, but that's okay, because we get new couples every week.

~~~~~~~~~~~~
Life is not all TV. I don't remember if I mentioned that Number One tore her MCL. I scolded her last week for causing me too much stress. I had the typical "back at school" stress dream, only instead of being in MY old high school or college, or newly enrolled in such, she'd made me go to school on her behalf. I couldn't find her locker, and had no schedule so even though I had a vague idea of where her classes were, I didn't know in what order. When I finally figured out which locker was hers, it was empty except for random papers, junk, and romance novels. Her binder (with her schedule) and all her textbooks were at home. The cat (Frisbee, of course) was in her locker, and I started to carry her back to homeroom, then halfway there said f*** it, there's no point.

I've had other weird dreams since then and can't remember them now, which is a shame because one featured Jared Padalecki very prominently.

~~~~~~~~~~~~
I have sent way too many sympathy cards lately. People need to stop dying, please.

~~~~~~~~~~~~
Starting to look forward to things. Movies in the next few weeks have some of my favorite actors or interesting storylines. May sweeps, though signaling finales, also promise stellar television. The retreat is only a month away, and this year Supernatural is a rerun, with the finale airing the following week! So I don't even have the horror of missing that to mar the weekend. It's sad to let go of the two-year tradition of Megan taping the show and dragging her TV and VCR to Waynesboro, but I have a feeling she won't mind so much.

City Islanders soccer is starting up again, the home opener occurring right after Number Two's 10th birthday. June 5, the kids' last day of school, looms, and summer always brings its logistical issues, but it also brings our late-June and early-August vacations. We didn't take a family vacation last year, and with Number One entering high school we're more intent than ever on filling those memory banks.

I've taken a writing break, unintentionally but it's difficult to get started when time is limited or fragmented. The kids are off today, I'm getting my car serviced, and then they have half days Wed-Fri, with IEP meetings and parent/teacher conferences and soccer games and practices and so on--very busy week.

The other really frustrating thing is my weight. I lost 15 pounds in 2007, kept it off for about 18 months, then discovered that I have an abnormal presentation of lactose intolerance that is eased by Lactaid. But since I started taking that, I've gained 10 pounds.

So I have to stop making excuses. Starting tomorrow, I am getting focused with both exercise and writing. Those two things will be priorities on my to-do list.

Wish me luck!

Skills Like This

Probably very few of my readers live in or near Hollywood, but just in case...

Skills Like This had a great opening weekend and has been extended another week at the Laemmle Sunset 5 in Hollywood California!

The people who created the film will be at the 5:30 showtime this Saturday for a Q&A. This includes the sweetest guy in Hollywood, Gabe Tigerman (who played Andy in Supernatural.

SKILLS LIKE THIS

"Audience Award" winner SXSW Film Festival
"Best of the Fest" Edinburgh Film Festival

For tickets click here.

To view the trailer click here.

"Eye-catching direction...off-beat chemistry."—NY Times

"For pure comedy this is the nuts."—Ain't it Cool News

"Cheerfully anarchic...indescribably genuine."—Salon.com

"Deftly directed...considerable intelligence and chemistry."—Variety

"An engaging and genuinely funny indie comedy."—TV Guide

"The ultimate tribute to smart, disaffected youth."—High Times

"Comedic chemistry that makes the film shine."—The Denver Post

"My favorite film of SXSW...for it's humor, honesty, and drive."—The Austin Chronicle

Kills Me

What, specifically, kills me?

This does. Even though I'm partially responsible for it.

So does this. And ditto.

It kills me that I had to vote for Dean while being more than half-convinced I want Sam to win. And that while I voted for complexity and blend of humor and pathos in the second one, my choices are losing. Twice.

And it really kills me that even though I really, really, REALLY don't want to know what happens in the season finale, I can't stop myself from reading a spoiler clearly labeled as a spoiler from a site that regularly spoils in a big way. GAAAHHHh.

Ant Season

I just killed a couple of those tiny baby ants in the bathroom. I guess, temperature notwithstanding, it's really spring.

We get these ants in the downstairs bathroom 'cause it's the basement, and, I don't know, maybe they're attracted to the trash can or something. It's not a big deal. We don't get many, and the spiders like to set up shop to keep them under control.

But now I'm dreading them returning to the kitchen. They swarm our sink. Ant traps don't work. Borax doesn't work. Sealing every crack around the window over the sink doesn't work. Just about the only thing that does is keeping the sink empty, but in a family of four people, that's darned near impossible. It means emptying the dishwasher the instant it's done running, so we can load it as we use dishes. But sometimes the timing (and energy level) just don't work out. *sigh*

~~~~~~~~
A character in a book I just read said that Saturn rearranges your life every seven years and there's nothing you can do about it. My first thought was "nuh-uh," but then I thought about the last significant change in our lives, when I quit my day job and started doing freelance editing/proofreading to go along with my writing. That was 2006. Seven years before that, I had a baby and moved into a new house. Seven years before that, I got married. Pretty freaky, huh? The next big change is to come in 2013. The year Number One graduates from high school.

Freee-ky.

~~~~~~~~
Speaking of Number One... she's gone, like, 22 seasons of soccer without real injury, beyond the typical bruises, nicks, and occasional twisted ankle. This spring, before they'd done more than practice, she had problems with her left calf, then sprained her left ankle, then pulled a hamstring. She's practiced and played with all of those, but last night, in her second game for the school team, five minutes into it she got her leg yanked (and therefore knee wrenched) by another player (tangled feet). I'm taking her to the orthopod this afternoon. Everyone please cross you fingers that it's nothing major.

I Watch Too Much TV

I'm also all over the Internet today. Here is superficial TV-watcher stuff. At GabWagon I get a little more serious, talking about major changes in the entertainment industry. If you want something lighter, check out my Meankitty interview. It's better than I remember (there've been so many great interviews, I felt dull in comparison), and Frisbee weighed in, too. And finally, I avoided thinking too hard with my Supernatural Sisters post, which is full of our favorite YouTube videos.


I haven't posted about general TV in a while. Here are my thoughts on what I'm watching, in random order:

Holy crap, how long is Prison Break going to be off the air? Seriously, why do networks keep taking shows off the air for so many months? Every time they do, ratings drop. If they know this, why continue the practice?

I watched the premiere of Kyle XY but then let the entire rest of the season go by before I started watching again. I have 4 episodes left. I still like the characters and the storylines, but I'm sick of Amanda and won't miss the show when it's over.

Speaking of not missing, I hate to say it, but I don't miss Pushing Daisies either. It's still on my DVR in case they ever decide to show the last couple of episodes, though. I think there are two left? And they said they might air them this summer.

I do miss Christian Slater and Alfre Woodard, but Dollhouse is satisfying my craving for a big, conspiracy-laden, action-packed show. I can't say it hooked me like Firefly or Supernatural did, but I don't think Buffy was as transcendent as everyone says, and I think we put humongous expectations on someone like Joss Whedon and his team. Impossible expectations. I also never cared for Eliza Dushku, so mine were lower than most people's seemed to be, and it's living up to them. There was a slightly abrupt shift in Paul and Mellie's relationship--it could have used a couple more episodes to shift her from starry-eyed needy-person to actual friend/girlfriend material. Otherwise, I loved the development of that and that she was a sleeper agent. I'm thinking it might be DeWitt on the inside. Or it's Echo and she wasn't programmed with those parameters at all, but has at least some control over her mind.

Dollhouse's partner on Friday nights is Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. Ever since we got a hint of what Riley's purpose was, the show has been a lot better. The episode where John found and confronted Jessie was amazing. John was suddenly no longer the sullen, rebellious kid, but the leader he was to grow up to be. Derek remained a true warrior, divorcing his feelings from his duty. Jessie wasn't the woman he'd fallen in love with originally. She was someone who had gone through different things, and made different choices, and was someone who would go to lengths he found unacceptable. We still don't know for sure if he shot Jessie. She could resurface.

I wrote the following before watching the most recent episode:
They say a male is going to die. As much as I like him, I want it to be Charlie. Or Ellison, that would be okay. As long as it's not Derek.
I changed my mind. I don't want it to be Charlie! Whhaaaaaahhhh!

Monday is a pretty full night. There's not much to say about Big Bang Theory and How I Met Your Mother. The former is a nice diversion that makes me smile, the latter has Neil Patrick Harris and excellently tight writing. Chuck is still on the bubble for me. I won't care if it gets canceled, but I enjoy watching. It's about freaking time they decided to train Chuck. I don't think Orion is dead, though, he's a very intriguing guy and if the show gets to continue, I have no doubt he'll be back.

Monday wraps up with Castle. I can't say I love it yet, but there are things I do love. Last week's ep kept me guessing. Nathan Fillion continues to be tremendous, but... When you're writing a novel with a female protagonist, especially one with romance in it, the stronger the female, the stronger the male counterpart has to be. I think that's the biggest flaw with Castle. Nathan dims almost everything around him. His daughter is a match, and Kate manages not to fade away. But the rest just doesn't stand out, and if the show fails, that will be why.

I was delighted with his screensaver last week (You Should Be Writing" in huge letters), and I also love the storytelling thing. They established in the pilot (I think--might have been episode 2) that he is a mesmerizing tale-weaver. So in the last ep, when he built a story for the final suspect and got him to confess, it was believable that Kate would let him, despite the fact that he's supposed to be an observer, not a consultant. This one won't be leaving my season pass anytime soon.

Let's see, what else... Reaper is another one I wouldn't miss, but continues to entertain. Sock's "sister" is annoying, but Ben's girlfriend makes me laugh, and Sock vs. Andi is probably the second best part of the show--Ray Wise remains the first.

The Mentalist is actually waning a bit for me. The gimmick is ceasing to be as compelling--maybe they're trying to mix it up too much or something? Or making Jane too flawed? I like it best when he's right and brilliant and cocky. On the other hand, I'd love to see his team get threatened and let us see how much he cares about them, what he'd sacrifice for them. We already saw the opposite.

I don't have much to write about Lost. I'm completely enthralled but for some reason, my brain doesn't dwell on it after I'm done watching. I'm dying to know what happens, but beyond that...

It's a simple happiness.

I've caught up on Bones and I have to say, it captured me much better when I was binging on it than it is now. Rumors of what's coming mostly leave me cold, though one or two details thrill me. We'll see how they play out. I'm with the fans who are annoyed with Fox for telling us we get 11 episodes in a row then changing their minds. Jerks. Moving nights doesn't bother me, because I don't consider it that hard to figure out. When you like a show, you pay attention. I know it's the casual viewers that get lost, but...oh, well.

Private Practice moved nights, too, and I don't think I've watched it since. I have 9 episodes built up on my DVR and not much compulsion to watch them unless I have nothing else to watch. They killed two kids in a row and the preview for the next one implied it might happen again. Unlike some people I know, that doesn't make me automatically stop watching, but it seems to have affected me subconsciously. Though it doesn't help that the other story developments have been less then appealing, themselves. I have less and less sympathy for anyone except Dell, and even he's had his moments.

I think the only other show on my schedule is Numb3rs. I like the woman they added, the former LA cop, and the parallelism of her and Liz with David and Colby. I don't like when it's Colby's turn not to be in an episode, though.

I've added two new shows to try. So far, Better Off Ted is a winner. The commercials they start the show with are brilliant, and the acting and chemistry are well done. They make the ridiculous seem less ridiculous. The jury's still out on other show, In the Motherhood. It's too shrill for my tastes, and people behaving badly has never been my favorite thing to watch.

Still to try are Cupid and Harper's Island. Cupid I'm kind of meh about because I don't care for Bobby Cannivale, though I do like Sarah Paulson. Harper's Island I'd probably never watch if it didn't have Jim Beaver primarily, plus Christopher Gorham (Jake 2.0) and a dozen other actors I like. It has a little too much horror vibe for me, but we'll see how it goes.

Just a few short weeks until the spring season is over and we're into the dull [TV] days of summer. What will you be sorriest to have be over?

Quick! Look Over Here!

Number Two said the sweetest thing to me today. She indicated a picture of me, my mother, and my brother that was taken about 18 years ago, and said how my brother looked so much younger, but I looked exactly the same.

Awwwwww.

Then she balanced it by saying "...well, the face." She was reluctant to elaborate. LOL

To distract you from the fact that I have nothing more interesting to say than that, I'm directing your attention to the following:

Supernatural March Madness Elite Eight: Vote on the best episodes of Supernatural.

In a similar vein, head over to the Alpha Male Madness Elite Eight. This would be your favorite actors/characters up against each other. Possibly.

If you're a writerly type, The Knight Agency is doing a Book in a Nutshell Competition. Get the attention of an editor with your very best nutshell description of your book!

Tracy Madison is holding a contest to win books. (Scroll down for the link to her newsletter.) She also has a...unique viewpoint on spring. :)

SciFi Chicks is still the place to go to discuss your favorite speculative TV shows. It has a new look, too!

And, of course, we can't forget Supernatural Sisters. So far this week we've talked about Kripke's take on wishin' and hopin' and debated what urban legends the show could still explore.

Oh! And one more thing. Megan Hart has an interview with Support Supernatural creators Heather Vitas and Lindsay Warren. After you read about this awesome women, head over to check out this year's charity campaign.